There are many people in my life that know how psoriasis affects me. A sub-set of those know my thoughts on helping others with the same condition. So I took a huge step for me, I signed up for a clinical trial.
that is right I signed up to be a human guinea pig.
but let me digress for a moment or two here. For a while I have been trying to find my passion, and I think it has been under my skin the whole time. This is the reason I am writing about this, Advocacy, of my conditions and to help others with this.
I did this not do this for me to test the next round of drugs coming down the pipe, or even to clear my skin up. I am doing this for generations to come, if not for the generation of my children then for their children. my hope in doing this is so children do not have to have the same issues growing up that I did. The depression and scratching are one part, the “is it contagious” question is another. There is also the constant feeling of being pushed away by other children.
So I am going to Orlando on the 26th for the initial interview to start on this test trial. I plan to keep some log of this adventure here as well as my vlogs. the keeping of records is so i can track what is going on and so can you.
So as we embark on this new adventure I open this up for comments, and ask you this. Would you ever sign up for a clinical trial?
Earlier this week I was reading “The Top Idea in Your Mind“. In this article Paul Graham talks about what you think most about in the shower is what you tend to drift to when your mind has a free moment. So I want to know can you hack thought?
What, how are you wanting to hack thought?
I am proposing that we can motivate out mind to think on our own terms a little better. That with the right tactics and techniques we could have our mind working for us vs the other way around. let me attempt to explain a little bit more in a different way.
I tend to let my mind drift when in the shower and through out the day. I feel that maybe if I read or study a problem, then allow that thought to flood my mind in the shower it then becomes my primary thought. beyond this it also allows me to work through it a little differently.
now how can this be of more use to me and maybe even you?
well to answer that I want to make another past thought come to light. I wondered about meditation God’s way, and not not my own way. I think that having a quiet time before a shower where you are asking yourself questions, and thinking about His word will influence your thoughts. those thoughts will help you to meditating in and on Him.
thought case 2, Writing and story lines. there are days that I think about writing a book I already have characters for. It seems that in the shower is where they wish to chatter the most. through out the rest of the day they have other conversations, and sometimes adventures.
So this is my theory and what I plan on testing in my life. I will keep you posted on how this works for me.
what are your thoughts on this?
there are times that I wonder what I am doing as a writer, vlogger, and such. and I think that what I have realized this is coming to is that if I want to be more successful than what I see now I am going to have to work at it a little more. I will have to hone my crafts and do where I haven’t done before.
This is also to apply to procrastination as well as better ways to wast time.
What does this all mean, it means I am stepping up my game. I am stepping up how I do my business. instead of slacking off so much I am going to do. not say I’m going to do as much.
Vlogs are coming to have a purpose and are getting there own site
my main business with DVNT tech will have its own site as a contact funnel.
and this site is still going to be my personal home for writing these random thoughts.
OK, but what is up with the name of this post?
well it was titled because I always wonder should I free write before writing a blog post or not. some days my blog post is my free writing (like today). then other days I have written the same thing in my head about 30+ times and the words come a little more naturally to me then.
So what is up with all that stuff at the top.
I am writing down goals and tasks that I need to accomplish, as well as warming up for all the other writing I need to accomplish. so as I feel this posting coming to an end and others floating around I bid you adieu.
but what is even worse is when you write and then let it sit for a few days to marinate and let other ideas grow as well. then come back edit and post. that is what I am learning to do. is write 1-3 post a day and tweak on them as I draft others and post when needed.
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what is in a name of a post. so many times before I write I try and find the name of the post and write from there. this does not always work. so today I thought I would try something a little different, I would write then come up with a clever title and maybe an image to go with it.
the last few days I have started to kick the habit of smoking. Sunday night was the last night with cigarette, now on Wednesday night I faulted and had 3. but I coughed and hacked every time and could not finish a whole one. This has lead to a few jitter problems over the last few days, but I know in the end I will be healthier for it.
next, as for my leg it has almost cease seeping and is about ready to start working out again. so these are the random thoughts for the day now for some real writing this afternoon.
ecko
This post has been some time in the making. I have had to gather my thoughts as to make myself clear. where this post comes from is from time looking at my social circles in life digitally and analog.
You may be asking your self “what does Ecko mean by this title?”
I tend to find that in my daily life when out in the real world I have a hard time talking to people. And this is more so with women than men. I do not always find it easy to start a conversation, or even hold much small talk. This leads to lack of what can sometimes be some really great conversation. And maybe even a lack of real life friends.
Here is the kicker thou on-line I can see the conversation and know I am allowed to join in. my opinion is my own and sometimes it matters. I have had opinions backfire on me and start flame wars. I have also had opinions taken well from people. And the best part of all I can always just sit and watch till I think I can add value to the conversation.
now here is what I’m wanting to do with this information. I am wanting to constantly push myself to grow and be a better person. I want to be a little more outgoing, I also want to question more things to learn about who or what I am talking about.
So have you ever just taken a look back on your life and said this is what I could stand to change?or if you want to just know more ask?
most days I feel apathetic, other days I feel like a crying mess. But in the end of all this I know I feel some sort of emotion, I feel something, I think people hide from their emotions by putting up emotional walls. And it is when we are all alone in solitude that we can break down and feel how bad we truly hurt.
I have hidden my emotions and feelings from people for a long time. I am guarded from people and relationships in the physical world. Yet this is odd in a sense of the fact I enjoy the physical touch of another person. I will explore this more in coming posts.
I digress and go back to the main point of this, and let you understand where this is coming from. This last week I have been in some pain from a boil coming up on my leg. Tuesday I decided to soak in the tub and draw it out. Side note the week before I was in a boat accident, this is for the next part. While I was soaking in the tub I started to wonder in my mind was this a boil or a blood clot. not having my computer near but a phone handy I made a call to someone with first hand experience. It did not help. I then called my mom she put it as did you look in to the symptoms bit. about that time I had made the decision to shower off and get on-line to see.
In my last few minutes before rising I had a conversation with another part of me from a different time. a time when I was more combative, egotistical, and just plain mean. this voice taunted me in my tears about a fear of death. it was so dark and cold in this area. Asking if “I still fear death”. In this raw emotional state that I realize it is not death I fear, as that’s what a man owes for his life and Sin. My wonder of a revelation, it is that knowing you are mortally wounded. wounded and knowing death may be near, but could still be some time.
What scared me was knowing that given some time left here. The thought of not loving again, or feeling the touch of another person. Made me question who and what I had become on the inside.
From this experience I have learned a new appreciation for Life and Love. These too will be further explored in a future posts.
So my question is this, In that deep dark place you don’t oft tread what is your greatest fear, and what did you learn from it?
I have been musing over the pledge for a few weeks now. The more I think about it the more the impact of its words hit me. and I feel that not everyone has felt this way.
For many years children and adults have said the pledge of allegiance. Most of us can recite this with little or no thought and do not always pay attention to what we are saying, as we have said it so many times in our life. I say lets look at this today.
I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the republic for which it stands, one nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.
The words of this Pledge hold power when read. They hold conviction, or should when recited. you are pledging loyalty and fidelity to your country, government, and fellow citizens.
You are saying that you are fully for this county. you are for the government, and the people. You are proclaiming that this country will not split and we will have freedom and justice for all.
I think that once you get to actually know the pledge, and understand what it is asking of you. you will find a better love for your country.
hey I don’t believe in God, you may say. well it has really only been in recent years that “under God” has been in the pledge and it is optional under freedom of speech to have it in there. as for me I will keep it in my recital.
what are your thoughts on this?
Wow that is a harsh title, but it is true. I came to this title whiles putting next and previous annotations on some of my videos.I stopped doing this about 1/2 way through. I stopped because I realized that in social media you have to keep up with things and constantly evolve.
constant evolution and progression you should not always worry about some of your old media. while for other things you should make sure all things are updated and continue to move forward. I know that with my vlog I want as much connectedness as possible yet I doubt that many people as they come to my vlog will go back to the very first days i was vlogging.
as of this writing the former 22 or so days has been connected back and forth up to current. I did this so i could start keeping my annotations up to date and that it would be easier to go back and forth. I also did this to get a little more familiar with adding annotations and work flow.
Pesky Rabbits
Now back on point, you will not always do things right in social media the first round. it is learning how to move on from failure or up from the bottom. it is about trial and error, and error correction through mitigation. it is about knowing what to connect where to connect it and how to build and nurture the relationships that follow.
Social Media is a place for humans to do business with other humans. we are in an age where business has to be transparent to be trusted and for a human to be on the other end of the connection. in this era we are making new paths and new ways. we should also fully expect that those behind us will change the way they do business in there own time.
What is your thoughts?
This is not some reference to the passion week of Christ before his Crucifixion. No this is something you may hear through out the interwebs. That you have to find a passion and run after it.
This week has been an interesting one, Monday through Friday. Everyday I have found someone or something that reminded me about passion. And it has shaped my week and given me a new prospective on this subject.
Monday
It was raining and lo in behold some Mormons came rapping at my door. This just showed me how much passion that they put in there faith. And duty to the church and the call of Christ to “go forth and make disciples in all nations.”
Could you say you have that kind of passion to go out in the rain and do what you love?
Tuesday & Wednesday
I stayed home and was watching other peoples Vlogs. I saw there passion for just having a great time, or time with their family. All this started to influence my thoughts this week.
Are you willing to share your passion with your family?
Thursday
I did what I now refer to as my normal Thursday rut. But it is not a rut I go and volunteer and I enjoy helping others in need. It is one of my passions to help others be in a better place in life.
Does your passion help others? can you help others with your passion?
Friday
I started out the day strong and got my vlog up. and it is after posting my own that I watch others I subscribe to. In watching this morning I saw that t-rave.com‘s vlog was on passion (he also shouted me on this subject).
Can others see what you are passionate about through you?
the questions have been asked, what is your response?
Just so you know, my passions include God, computers, Linux, volunteering, family, and friends.
Site issues – Comments fixed
So if you have visited the site and realized you could not comment, well it is fixed now. inelegant by a theme change. well this is good and bad as I have wanted a change around here. just did not want to change in this way.
I am ok with this as for the fact I was wanting to bring a more cohesive look and feel to my little network of sites. so now while you get to look at this site with this off theme and think what is he going to do.
fear not for I will tell you. I plan on having this site, twitter, youtube, and another site all looking about the same color, and background wise. this is how the big boys do it I am going to do it this way as well.
so in the coming time you may see little tweaks here and there untill the release of the new themes.
so that is the quick update from this end